Titan Sized Hotdog
by Punk Rock Kitsune
Summary: After a long day of attending college classes, Levi wants something tasty to eat. After visiting a hotdog place Hanji suggested to him, Levi might be hungry for a different kind of sausage in a bun. Ereri.


**Hey guys! Happy Sunday! :D**

**This is a oneshot I did based on two pictures my fellow Instagram friend levi_the_queen_of_guyliner posted a few days ago. One of the pictures is in fact the title image. XD The link to both pictures are ****on my profile.**

**Enjoy the story~!**

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><p><em><strong>Title: <strong>__Titan Sized Hotdog_

_**Rating: **__M _

_**Warnings: **__Ereri sexy times! ;) Lot of hotdog puns. And jokes. My sense of humor is weird, and it's not for everyone. So no complaining!_

_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own SnK. Credit goes to Hajime Isayama._

_**Summary: **__After a long day of attending college classes, Levi wants something tasty to eat. After visiting a hotdog place Hanji suggested to him, Levi might be hungry for a different kind of sausage in a bun. Ereri. _

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><p><em>Maria University, Home of the Titans!<em>

Levi stared at the cheesy school banner as he tapped his foot impatiently, waiting for his three o'clock math class to finally end. His teacher was droning on and on about the exam she passed back.

Levi was not satisfied with his grade. This is his final year in college, and he can't afford to get C's on important exams. He tucked some of his short black hair behind his ear, sighing.

As soon as the clock hit 3:50, the short college senior stood up and walked out with his black backpack.

"Hey! Wait up!" The loud voice of his friend Hanji Zoe called out.

Levi slowed his pace until the brunette caught up with him.

"So, what did you think of the way our teacher went over the exam?" Hanji asked innocently.

"Fuck that teacher." Levi muttered.

"Ew! I don't wanna fuck her! She smells like fish!" Hanji wrinkled her nose. "Besides, I thought you were into guys!"

She smirked at the scowl on Levi's face.

"Sometimes I don't know if you're being sarcastic, or just plain dumb. Maybe you're just a special kind of stupid." Levi growled, approaching an elevator. He pushed the down button irritably.

"Yeah, one that got an A on her exam." Hanji poked the shorter student's arm playfully.

"Fuck you. She marked off points because I didn't complete the problems her way. It's dumb. As long as I get the correct answer, it shouldn't matter how I got it." Levi rolled his eyes. "Oh, well. I'm hungry. Wanna go to the dining hall with me?"

"Sorry, I can't." Hanji replied regrettably. "I have my chemistry lab at four thirty today. I don't want you to go to the dining hall and endure that horrible food alone. Ooh!" Hanji suddenly remembered something. "There's this new hotdog place that opened last week near the student center. It's been under construction for months. You should go there!"

Hanji fumbled around in her backpack as the elevator door opened. "I have a flyer in here somewhere…"

"Get on the damn elevator. You're holding up traffic." Levi scoffed, pushing Hanji inside.

As soon as the five students standing behind Levi got on, the elevator closed and began its descent to the first floor.

"Here it is!" Hanji shoved the folded pamphlet in Levi's face. "It's called 'Maria's Hotdogs, home of the Titan Hotdog!'"

"…catchy. I can't imagine how much creativity went into that." Levi muttered sarcastically, opening the pamphlet. "And explain to me how going to the dining hall is worse than going to a greasy hotdog canteen."

"Well, for starters, the canteen serves nothing but wieners, which is something you're familiar with." Hanji sneered.

Levi smacked Hanji on the back of her head. "Cut the cheeky shit."

"Fine!" Hanji huffed, rubbing her head. "Anyways, I hear that it's actually good. They've only been open for a week, and a bunch of people have gone and eaten there, including Erwin. I think he said a lot of people were eating there just so they could stare at the mascot guy advertising outside the canteen."

Levi raised an eyebrow. "You mean the person in charge of dancing around like a spaz on crack in a costume with a sign? Oh, please."

"I dunno Levi. He might be cute." Hanji winked at him.

"…" Levi crossed his arms. "I'll go to the fucking canteen, but I'm not going because of the mascot guy. I bet he looks ridiculous as fuck."

"We'll see." Hanji grinned.

The elevator opened its doors, releasing the students inside.

"You should get the Titan Hotdog." Hanji suggested to Levi. "I heard it's the best thing there. I'll see you later!"

"Later." Levi said before they parted ways.

The short man really wanted to get wasted tonight. After all of the hard work he's putting into his final semester of college, he deserves to let loose and have some fun. He looked down at the pamphlet again.

"It's in the student center, hmm? Let's have a looksee." Levi said to himself.

Levi strode to the huge student center. As the crisp fall breeze whipped past him, he pulled the hood of his grey jacket up over his head and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

As Levi approached the student center, a group of freshmen emerged from the building and walked past him, laughing and joking around with each other. How did Levi know they were freshmen? Several of them were wearing their high school apparel from their senior year. No upperclassman wears that shit.

As the group walked away, Levi sighed. He began to grow wistful as he thought about his four years of college.

_I've attended Maria University all this time, and nothing has really caught my interest. Of course the parties are absolutely wild. And I have good friends that will probably be with me forever. But… I wanted more. I'm not sure what, but something's missing. I just hope I find it before I graduate. _

Levi removed his hood before entering the student center. He shrugged off his backpack to retrieve his wallet. After putting it in his pocket, Levi resumed his short journey to Maria's Hotdogs. After five minutes, he saw the lit up sign for the canteen.

And then, he saw _him_. Levi almost ignored the ridiculous hotdog costume he was in as he stared into his green eyes. Almost.

Standing in front of Maria's Hotdogs was a brunette a few inches taller than Levi. He was smiling rather tackily as he held up a white sign that read 'Try out new Titan Hotdogs' in black bold lettering. There seemed to be a sparkle about him that Levi had never seen before.

Eren made eye contact with the man. His cheesy smiling widened further. "Welcome to Maria's Hotdogs!"

If the kid hadn't said something so unattractive, Levi would have swooned at his voice.

"…thanks." Levi replied, using a slightly flirtatious tone.

The brunette looked away, trying to hide an incoming blush. Smirking, Levi gave the boy one last once over before walking inside. There's no way he's passing that delicious piece of eye candy up. He devised an ingenious plan in his mind. It's his last year, and his only chance to do something this crazy.

_I may get a hotdog after all, but not the ones on the menu._ Levi sneered inwardly.

Levi strolled up to the counter. Luckily, there was no one else in line. Seeing as it was four o'clock, he missed the lunchtime crowd.

There were three students working behind the counter. Two of them were guys with white aprons, one with sandy hair and the other with black hair and freckles. They both were cooking hotdogs. A black haired girl with black eyes was standing at the cash register in her pink and red uniform shirt and a pink visor.

"Welcome to Maria's Hotdogs. What can I get for you, sir?" The girl asked politely.

Levi glanced at her name tag. It read 'Mikasa.'

"Well, Mikasa, I'm not sure how much it will cost." Levi said coyly, taking out his wallet.

"All of the prices are listed next to the items on the menu." Mikasa said, pointing to the menus on the wall. She was slightly confused at Levi's statement.

"What I want is not on the menu." Levi grinned cunningly.

Levi took out three twenty dollar bills and slapped them on the counter. "What I want is that hotdog standing outside."

Levi pointed to the brunette, who was still smiling and holding up his sign.

"You mean Eren?!" Mikasa gasped, narrowing her eyes. "No. He's working right now! You can't just buy him!"

"Oh? But he's a hotdog, is he not?" Levi pointed out. "So he's fair game. Today's special, even."

"Absolutely not!" Mikasa crossed her arms firmly.

"Oh, let him take Jaeger!" The sandy haired worker walked up behind Mikasa.

"Jean! What are you saying?" The freckled worker asked worriedly.

"Relax, Marco. I got this." Jean replied confidently. "Think about it, Mikasa. Eren's shift ends in thirty minutes anyway. And this guy is basically handing over _sixty dollars_ for nothing else in return. That goes straight to our paychecks!"

"No!" Mikasa stood by her answer.

"Look at poor Jaeger over there, Mikasa." Jean tried again, using a different tactic. "You know he's miserable, standing out there in a hotdog suit. He's smiling, but it's a fake one. If only he didn't almost burn this place down during training, he would have been in here working the kitchen with us. So let him loose, will you?"

Mikasa sighed. "Fine. As long as Eren is happier. That's all that matters."

Without saying another word, Levi spun around and marched out to collect Eren.

"You only have thirty minutes!" Mikasa called after him, still wary.

"Thirty minutes is all I need." Levi snickered.

Levi went over to Eren and grabbed his arm. "Well Eren, you might as well call yourself Jesus Christ, because your friends in there sold you out to me for money."

"Wait, what?!" Eren was bewildered. "How do you know my name?"

"Just shut up and come with me, brat." Levi ordered. "You hate being in that suit, right? I'm saving you. So let's go."

Still confused, Eren let Levi drag him away. Sure enough, the pair received some strange looks as they walked through the student center.

"Who are you?" Eren asked, trying to pull his arm out of Levi's grip.

The ravenette wasn't having any of that, so he tightened his hold. "I'm Levi. The best fucking thing that could ever happen to you."

After a few minutes, Levi had pulled Eren to the secluded basement area of the student center.

"Take that costume off, brat." Levi commanded. "Whoever came up with the idea to have you dance around in a fallacy thing like that is a fucking weirdo."

Eren had no complaints. He quickly unzipped himself and shrugged the hotdog suit off. After he did so, Eren stretched his arms, the action raising his sweater up. Levi didn't bother hide his appreciation as he stared at the teasing view of Eren's abs.

"I hate being in that costume." Eren laughed, embarrassed. "I have to do it because-"

"You almost burnt the place down. I know." Levi sniggered.

Eren sat down on the marble steps. "So why did you abduct me, Levi?"

Levi stood in front of the brunette. He smirked inwardly at the way Eren's eyes studies his lithe form.

"Because you looked like the tastiest hotdog out of all of the ones in the place."

If Eren's face wasn't red before, it definitely was now. "W-What?!"

Levi clicked his tongue, a bit annoyed. "You're a freshman, aren't you?"

"Yeah." Eren mumbled, hiding his face.

"Thought so, brat. Your reactions are of a typical eighteen year old virgin. It's kinda cute, actually. And usually I despise cute." Levi teasingly ran a hand through Eren's messy brown hair.

Eren shivered at his touch. "And you must be a senior."

"And how'd you guess that?" Levi asked, his hand trailing down Eren's arm.

"Well, your height definitely didn't give it away. It was the fact that you're acting like a condescending asshole." Eren sneered.

Levi's right eye twitched. "Tch. Shitty brat. And to think I was gonna go easy on you."

"What do you mea-? _Mmph_!" Eren was cut off by Levi's lips pressed forcefully against his own.

The shorter man knelt down until he was almost sitting in Eren's lap. He pushed Eren back slightly so he could get better access to his mouth. Levi swept his tongue across Eren's bottom lip once before shoving it in his mouth. Eren's mind grew cloudy from the extremely hot kiss. He felt his resistance melt away as Levi completely took over.

Levi pulled away, a string of saliva connecting the two. They were panting softly.

"Listen up, Eren. I paid sixty dollars to eat your hotdog, so you're giving it to me right now." Levi simpered, running a hand down Eren's leg.

The brunette squeezed his legs together, trying to stop his growing erection. "All of the hotdogs are inside, you know."

"Oh, I want one in particular." Levi spread Eren's legs apart and unzipped his jeans. "My friend suggested that I try the Titan Hotdog, so I will. Let's hope yours lives up to the name."

Levi palmed Eren's erection through his boxers, eliciting a wanton moan from him.

"Oh? It feels pretty big so. Let's take a look." Levi pulled down Eren's jeans and underwear, the erection springing free. It stood up at attention, as if Levi were a respected corporal.

Levi gave the base a teasing lick before massaging it slowly. As the stroking grew faster, Levi kissed Eren's tip before taking it in his mouth, sucking it like a newborn.

"Ahh… Levi…" Eren's face was hot, and his moans were increasing in volume.

Levi removed his hands in favor of engulfing Eren's entire cock. Eren gasped at the abrupt pleasurable feeling, almost cumming into Levi's mouth at that moment. Levi went down as far as he could go, hollowing out his cheeks so he could take more of him in. He looked into Eren's lust ridden eyes. He wanted more, Levi could tell. And Levi himself wanted more, too.

Levi released Eren's warm shaft, the sudden coldness making Eren shudder.

"Your Titan hotdog is pretty tasty by itself, but no hotdog is complete without the _bun_." Levi told the horny brunette. "And lucky for you, my buns are available."

Levi shrugged off all of his clothes, and Eren hastily removed his shirt. Making sure Eren was watching, Levi stuck three fingers in his mouth and sucked them. Even though he felt a bit disgusted, he didn't have any lube with him, so he had to make do with his own saliva.

Levi spread his legs and inserted one finger inside, pushing past the tight ring of muscles. It's been a while since Levi had sex, so he knew this preparation was completely necessary. Levi bit his lip as he put in a second finger and started pushing them in and out.

Eren watched in awe, mesmerized by the way Levi's pink hole sucked in his fingers. Eren's erection ached at the sight, yearning to be inside him.

As soon as Levi got to three fingers, Eren couldn't wait any longer. He crawled on top of Levi, rubbing the tip of his cock against Levi's puckering hole. Levi gritted his teeth, the teasing absolutely torturous.

"Put it in already!" Levi ordered, thrusting his hips towards Eren to gain more friction.

Eren leaned his head down, his mouth next to Levi's ear.

"By the way, I should have told you this earlier, but you were wrong about something. I am _not_ a virgin." Eren whispered, licking the shell of Levi's ear.

Before the short man could respond, Eren pushed the tip inside Levi.

"…!" Levi clutched Eren's shoulders.

Eren pushed more and more of his girth inside until he was fully seated inside. Levi was panting, sweat shimmering on his pale skin.

"Levi, you feel so warm." Eren murmured, placing butterfly kisses on Levi's neck.

The brunette began to move, setting a medium pace. Levi accidentally let out a moan. He quickly bit his lip so no more noises could escape.

"No, I wanna hear you." Eren told Levi, grabbing his hips. "You bought some time with my hotdog, right? I wanna hear what you think of it."

Eren's next thrust hit a spot that made Levi see stars and lose control.

"Fuck!" Levi shouted.

"There it is." Eren smirked.

The brunette picked up speed relentlessly pounded into Levi's prostate. Levi's cries increased as he was fucked onto the smooth floor. Eren's eyes never left Levi's face. He looked so delectable.

"Levi… I'm about to…!" Eren stammered.

"Do it. Cum inside." Levi wrapped his legs around Eren, pulling him in deeper.

Eren followed orders. After a few more thrusts, Eren released all of his semen inside. Levi came as well, splattering his essence all over Eren's stomach.

The brunette fell on top of Levi, slowly catching his breath.

"Hey, brat… what time does your shift end when you work?" Levi asked.

Eren sat up slightly so he could look into Levi's eyes. "I work Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays from one until four thirty. Why?"

"Because I want to see you again." Levi replied simply. "And we have to do something about Tuesdays, Thursdays, and the weekend. I guess I can just give you my phone number."

Eren's face lit up like a Christmas tree. "Really?"

"Yeah."

Eren leaned down and captured Levi's lips in a sweet kiss, happy that something wonderful came out of his shitty job.

_**~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.**_

"Eren, where is he? He's twenty minutes late!" Mikasa paced back and forth behind the counter.

"Yeah." Marco agreed, sighing. "I wonder what he and that guy are doing."

"Eren's probably tossing his salad like his name's Romaine." Jean replied simply.

Mikasa and Marco stared at him.

"What?" Jean raised his hands in defense. "Did you _not_ see the way that short guy was ogling Eren? He looked at him like he was a piece of meat."

"If that's the case, I'm making sure Eren goes vegetarian." Mikasa scowled, crossing her arms.

_**~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.**_

_**Hours Later**_

"Levi! Hey!" Hanji called.

Levi, Hanji, and Erwin met up later that night to go hang out.

"So, how did you like Maria's Hotdogs?" Hanji asked excitedly. "Was it as good as they say? Did you get the Titan Hotdog?"

Levi smirked. "Oh, yes. But, I got a Titan hotdog no one else was able to eat."

Erwin caught on immediately, but Hanji was still confused. "What? But there's only one Titan Hotdog."

"Not anymore. And _he's_ all mine." Levi licked his lips.

The brunette's eyes widened in realization. "Levi, you fucked the mascot guy?!"

"Other way around, shit glasses." Levi sneered. "And from the looks of it, I'll be having as many servings as I like."

"Damn Levi, you work fast." Hanji slapped Levi on the back. "You did that faster than you figured out I was transgender!"

Erwin chuckled as the two threw insults back and forth.

_Looks like Levi found what he was looking for to make his life more worthwhile._

_**Finis**_

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><p><strong>I had the urge to make so many Anaconda jokes, but I restrained myself and only made one. Be proud of my self-control! XD<br>**

**So I hope you enjoyed this oneshot! If you did, be sure to add it to your favorites! And if you like **_**me**_** (lol), add me to your favorites and alerts.**

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**See ya in the next story! :3**

**PRK**


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